You Know Your Past. Now what?
A weekend to share your story, grieve what was missing, be held, and make space for who you are becoming.
April 8 – 11, 2027 | Bask Retreat Center | Centerville, Tennessee
RAISED
ADAPTED
SURVIVED
BECOMING
A Weekend to Tell the Truth
You Were Raised. But Perhaps You Weren’t Really Nurtured.
You can understand why your mother couldn’t give you what you needed and still grieve that you didn’t receive it.
Both can be true.
Maybe you had a home.
Maybe you had food on the table.
Maybe your mother was physically present.
And yet, somewhere deep inside, you knew something was missing.
Something was missing. And it mattered.
THE GRIEF
A Funeral With No Casket.
There may be no funeral.
No casseroles.
No care notes.
No one asking:
“What can I do for you?”
“Are you okay?”
“What do you need?”
And yet, there may still be something to mourn. You may be grieving the nurturing you needed but didn’t receive. The comfort that didn’t come. The encouragement you longed to hear. The emotional safety you needed. The feeling of being seen, known, heard, celebrated, and deeply cared for.
This is an often invisible grief. And you don’t have to carry it alone.
What If Your “Patterns” Have a Story?
What if the people-pleasing, over-functioning, over-achieving, hyper-independence, difficulty receiving love, and persistent feeling of not belonging aren’t simply “bad habits” you need to eliminate? What if some of these patterns grew around an unacknowledged grief?
PEOPLE PLEASING
Perhaps you learned to anticipate everyone else’s needs because your own weren’t consistently noticed.
OVER-FUNCTIONING
Perhaps you became exceptionally capable because depending on others didn’t feel safe.
DIFFICULTY SAYING NO
Perhaps you learned to say yes because “no” felt dangerous.
OVER ACHIEVING
Perhaps you became an over-achiever because some part of you believed that if you just did enough, you might finally feel worthy.
HYPER INDEPENDENCE
Perhaps you became independent because you learned early that you might have to figure things out for yourself.
These adaptations made sense.
They helped you survive. But what helped you survive then may not be what you need to carry forward now.
A Weekend to
Become
Raised, But Not Really: You Know Your Past. Now what? is a time to gather, be held, be nurtured, share your story, and find sacred time to become. Our time together isn’t about blaming or fixing – it is about grieving what was missing because it mattered.
Something was missing. And it mattered. And you are allowed to grieve it.
There Will Be Space…
Together, we will create space to explore the grief of emotional absence and the ways it may have shaped how we see ourselves, how we relate to others, how we give and receive love, and how we experience belonging.
REFLECTION
There will be space for reflection.
CONVERSATION
Space for conversation.
TEARS
Space for tears.
LAUGHTER
Space for laughter.
QUIET
Space for quiet.
And space to simply be with women who don’t need you to explain why it mattered.
You Don’t Have to Have It All Figured Out.
You don’t have to arrive with the right words.
You don’t have to have your childhood neatly organized into a story.
You don’t have to prove that your experience was “bad enough.”
You don’t have to blame your mother to acknowledge what you didn’t receive.
Because sometimes healing begins when we stop asking: “What’s wrong with me?”
and begin asking: “What happened to me?”
There is a difference. And that difference can change everything.
What Becomes Possible?
Our childhood may help us understand how we learned to survive.
Our adaptations made sense.
But as adults, we get to ask a new question:
What still belongs in my life?
What beliefs?
What patterns?
What relationships?
What ways of loving?
What ways of abandoning myself?
And perhaps most importantly: What do I want to choose now?
This retreat is an invitation to begin exploring those questions in the company of women who understand.
Come Gather
With Us
Come gather with other women who don’t need you to explain why it mattered.
Come grieve what was missing.
Come honor the woman you became.
Come meet the parts of yourself you may have learned to silence.
Come remember that needing love never made you unlovable.
And come discover that you don’t have to carry this story alone.
GRIEF
HEALING
CONNECTION
A LIFE RENEWED
Your Grief Retreat Facilitators
Copyright © 2026 Pam Monjar, LPC-MHSP | All Rights Reserved | Privacy Policy | Terms of Use
Branding + Website designed by Marsha Craig